This particular video by Social Samosa,a online media publication landed in my Instagram messenger about a month ago.After watching it when I further shared with my girlfriends, it led to some intense passionate discussions.Everyone had something to say.

How do you feel after watching this video?Do you agree with the message here?

I believe the message that, while the world has progressed yet some roles haven’t ,stands true for women all around the world and not just India.

<Click on the play button to watch the video>

<Click on the play button to watch the video>

Kitchens have gender inequality.This is not to say that women don’t enjoy cooking or are forced into it.It simply underlines the fact that most women don’t have a choice or say in this matter.

Working or not,women find themselves taking responsibility of the kitchen,be it cooking themselves,managing the cook,planning the meals,grocery planning and so on and so forth and once she becomes a mother the kitchen workload increases by two folds.

Pandemic has only widened this gap in some households putting all the pressure on the woman while in few it has narrowed the gap as men watched their partners cook meals after meals,realizing all the effort that goes in getting that one hot meal on the table.

I have been on different sides of the spectrum,a working woman,a working mom and finally a stay-at-home mom,each time I have taken the responsibility of the kitchen without anyone asking me too.

It wasn’t forced upon me,It happened naturally.I didn’t know any different.The same stands true for most of my girlfriends.I honestly don’t know anyone in my circle who can say that their partners share the kitchen workload.

S helps out with the kitchen.Saturdays are his days.He puts on his chef hat whipping out some new tasty recipes for breakfast.He can cook so many dishes that I can’t.

He enjoys cooking ,but if I asked him to be chef for a whole week I doubt he would enjoy it much.

I don’t hold it against him.It’s not easy being in the kitchen whipping up healthy thoughtful dishes after dishes for your family.It takes time thought,effort and energy.

Today I absolutely enjoy cooking for my girls and my heart melts when I get the cutest and best compliments from them.I have been doing this for close to 12 years now.It’s now my second nature to cook.

Perhaps when were newly married,instead of taking on the role myself,had we discussed and taken it up as shared responsibility it would have been different.But we didn’t know any different.

For centuries now both the genders have been taking up the societal defined roles.It won’t be fair to place the blame solely on the opposite gender.

Today’s men are much more empathetic,they are open to sharing the workload and helping around the house.They should be proud of themselves.They have learnt to unlearn and break some of these societal expectations.

S is conscious of how girls would perceive it if it’s always me doing the meals,so now and then he steps up! Like today he decided to take control of the dinner while I am out with the girls at their swim lessons.

There is a lot of unlearning to be done on our part if we want to make this change happen.This role should be a choice and not an expectation.We have to believe this will work and work on it.

While it may not happen overnight for our generation this needn’t be the case for our kids, boys and girls.They need to know that roles can be swapped or shared.They do have a choice.

We shouldn’t have to say he helps,we should be saying we share.

We have a choice here, we should do our bit in breaking these stereotypes and roles,however small.If tomorrow our sons want to share or take the responsibilities of the kitchen then they should be able to do so without a second just as girls do it today.

There always will be pros and cons to any discussion,what is important that we start the discussing and participate.Only then will we start seeing the changes that we desire. How do you feel about all of this?

Kuch toh badle ga!